Cancer is happening all around me. My friend, Lisa, was diagnosed not too long after me, but her situation was so much more advanced than mine. She is currently undergoing chemotherapy and will also have to do radiation.
Michelle at Knock, Knock, it’s cancer, has had so many complications and is currently undergoing chemotherapy.
I feel incredibly blessed and guilty at the same time. I had cancer, but it was non-invasive, so no chemo, no radiation, no nothing. Right now it just feels like I had surgery for something other than cancer. I know come June when I have my prophylactic bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction I will feel differently, but right now I just wonder why I was spared and these other wonderful women are having to go through this.
Last weekend I went on my annual Women’s Retreat to Mo Ranch. Before leaving I was talking to my boss who is very open about his faith. He was telling me how blessed I am and I said I guess God has big plans for me. My boss quoted Jeremiah 29:11 to me “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and hot to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” While walking around the gift store on Saturday afternoon, a key chain with this verse practically jumped out at me. It is now hanging on my key ring.
I took time while I was at Mo Ranch to visit the Labyrinth. Even though I had walked the Labyrinth on on of my previous visits, I felt I needed to walk it this time. The Labyrinth is our path to God. The path has only one way to God, but it is filled with twists and turns. At times we are very close to God and then in a few steps we are far away. Walking towards the center, tears were streaming down my face. I thought about my journey that I have been on lately and the path my life has gone through, but once I reached the center I felt completely different and walked the path back out smiling and feeling at peace. It is such a wonderful experience and I plan on researching Labyrinths as soon as tax season is over. I know there are some Labyrinths at closer churches and I hope to visit them when I feel like I need to walk the path again.